Thursday, February 22, 2007

What a Cluster F*ck, Part 2

If you haven't read Part 1 yet, please do so.

Everything was set and we got the call that the bad guy would be at the meet in about an hour. We all headed out and started loading into the van. BP got behind the wheel with JH riding shotgun. The rest of us got into the back…you know, where there is no place to sit and there are metal posts sticking up in the air. The shag carpet was so nasty that it made me gag and we had to kneel on it. We rocked on our heels as we headed to the hotel. BP was not the smoothest driver and we got slung around at every light and turn.

Once we arrived at the hotel, BP backed into a parking space on the back side of the hotel, shut off the motor and we waited. The patrol cars were a short distance away waiting on the highway to be called in. We waited and waited, they were late. My legs were cramping from being in a squatted position for so long. People were sweating because we couldn’t run the air so that added to the funky smell. Stake outs look like so much more fun on TV. I am squatting there thinking, “What the hell have I done? This sucks.” The look out sends out the transmission that the bad guys were pulling in. He gave us the description of the car and told us that there were two occupants.

You could feel the change in the van even though you couldn’t see it. The air crackled with adrenaline and testosterone. We all rocked on the balls of our feet, got better grips on our weapons. I was to be first out. JH was to jump out of the passenger door and yank open the sliding door for us. My job was to handcuff the driver as soon as someone dragged him out. The others were to follow right behind. The person behind me had his hand on my left shoulder. Each person had their hand on the shoulder of the person in front of them. When we started moving, we were to move as a unit fanning out as we exited the van to our designated jobs.

Game time! We got the signal to move in. The bad guys were inside and were finalizing the deal. BP started the van, slammed it in drive, and floored it. We all lurched backwards and starting fighting for balance. He pulled in behind the car; he was supposed to get within a foot of his bumper if not touching it. He slammed on his brakes throwing us all forward as he stopped a good car length behind the bad guys car. We ram into each other, legs, arms, guns all wrapped up in a knot. Instead of being out first, I was now smashed into that nasty smelly carpet with a good 300 pounds of flailing, pissed police on top of me and a shotgun whacking me in the side of the head.

JH cussed at BP, telling him to block the fucking car, block the damn car. BP screams back saying he thought he was blocking the son of a bitch, he forgot his glasses! We are trying our best to untangle ourselves and get out of the van. We are screaming for JH to get the door open; meanwhile the bad guys have run out of the hotel and are getting in their car. JH jerks the door open and we pile out, reaching for equipment to make sure it is still in place. JH and BP also pile out.

The police cars were coming around the ends of the buildings to get into place to block both exits. We are now on foot running toward the car that was backing out of its parking place. They had plenty of space to back up! They screeched out, burning rubber and fish-tailing as they picked up speed. Like morons, we started running after them as if we could outrun them or something. About halfway to the end of the building, it began to dawn on us that we needed wheels! Just as GS, the veteran, BH, and I turned around to run back to the van, Joe Cool pulls out his 45 mag and pops off two rounds at the escaping car. It sounds like a cannon going off. JH already had his gun in his hand, startled by the sudden explosion; pops off a couple of rounds himself. The patrol car that was in the line of fire decided to get the hell out of Dodge. He floored it, jumping the curb and almost driving into the pool. As we were running full tilt back to the van, GS says, “Don’t you even think of shooting!” to me and I replied, “No worry!” as if we were sitting in a coffee shop eating donuts. The bad guys drove around the backend of the patrol car, leaving the area with the dope that we just sold them! Can you say we are fucked!?

GS jumped behind the wheel, BH in the passenger seat, and me in the back of the van as we speed out of the parking lot to try to catch them. Tomorrow, the best is yet to come!

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